Just call me Reg

Round and Round We Go

The catapult systems on aircraft carriers can propel a 45,000 pound plane from 0 to 165 mph in two seconds. Pretty dang impressive. Apparently many ISPs studied this amazing feat when building their own plans for customer expulsion.

I’ve been a customer of my current service provider for nearly 12 months now. That can only mean that we’re about to end our relationship. See they now want to charge me almost $30 more a month for the privilege of using their valuable service. Do they really think that after dealing with their unreliable phone service and less than stellar support they can increase my rates and keep my business? Seriously, who comes up with these plans? Let’s give new customers a solid introductory price and then jack up the rates once they learn how awful we are to deal with because they certainly won’t be able to find another service more unfriendly and incompetent than we are. Is there a hidden prize for turn over rates? Is this some kind ego thing that is beyond my simple minded comprehension? “We had another stellar year, we brought in 3 million new customers while jettisoning 98% of our existing customer base. It’s key that we remove all stale users before they contaminate us.”

I even called my current provider and said:

“I’ve been very frustrated with your phone service as it’s been down several times a month almost every month for a year. But the last month has been better so what kind of price will you give me to retain me as a customer?”

The reply of course was that they cannot offer any promotions to existing customers. You know because money from existing customers isn’t nearly as valuable as money from potential customers. I even explained that I can switch to either of their main competitors without any installation fees and get a lower monthly price guaranteed for 12 months. Still nothing they can do about it.

So we’ll be switching services next week. Already the new service isn’t doing any better. They offer the triple play: Internet, phone, and tv. I signed up for all three after verifying that I could drop the tv and not affect my 12 month rate. We don’t normally watch enough tv to justify the cost, but the Jazz could have a good run through the playoffs so I figured I’d try it for at least a month or two. But later they called and indicated that dropping the tv would result in a $75 fee. Again, let me get this straight. I’m willing to pay money for tv service for a least a couple of months, but they’d rather just not have my money at all than have to deal with the extreme pain of deactivating my tv?

It’s not really shocking to hear about the financial pains the network is going through. I expect at the current rate of things the merry-go-round will be spinning indefinitely.

April 23, 2008 - Posted by reggie | Tech | , | 6 Comments

6 Comments »

  1. Ugh! Such headaches. You’re right — their business models do not make sense. You would think customer retention would be part of its marketing plan AND that they would want your money. I long for some common sense!

    We bundle our cable and modem, but they’re too expensive. We’re staying, though, because I can see every BYU football game and most of the b-ball games (even though DirecTV is adding the Mountain, it still doesn’t offer CSTV or Versus like my cable service does). So basically, the sports package is what drives us to stay. I’m annoyed, though. I look forward to the day when we can select individual channels and don’t have to use a particular package.

    Go Jazz!

    Comment by Lisa | April 24, 2008 | Reply

  2. I am afraid you are talking about iProvo? Please tell me that you are talking about another provider. they are definitely not worth another 30 bucks.

    argh!

    Comment by tim | April 24, 2008 | Reply

  3. Well, not iProvo directly since they’re not allowed to retail the service. iProvo has two providers now and I expect we’ll be bouncing between the two since neither appears to be able to keep it’s customers. We might bounce over to comcast now and again too. None of the three standout in any significant manner.

    Comment by reggieg | April 24, 2008 | Reply

  4. MSTAR has been better as of late, but again, not worth 30 more per month. have you heard if xmission is available for us yet?

    Comment by tim | April 24, 2008 | Reply

  5. If you ever get Verizon FiOS you’ll be hooked! We don’t really watch more than we used to, we just get to watch the shows we really want to watch. Instead of just flipping channels. And for us, it’s a better deal to bundle all three together. Good luck with the negotiations…

    Comment by Kayelynn | April 24, 2008 | Reply

  6. So I am going to have to post an ad in the paper – Single White Female – since we are dropping cable in the middle of the Jazz playoffs, I certainly won’t be seeing Reg any time too soon.

    And as for iProvo – let’s just say Lewis Billings – what a baffoon. Everything he touches goes in the hole a million plus a year! iProvo is one of those exceptions…they go negative 3 million a year. Keep up the good work Lewis. I can’t wait to pay for your stupid airport!

    Comment by Holliann | April 25, 2008 | Reply


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